The Biblical Counseling Coalition publishes several 31-Day Devotionals for Life. The structure for each devotional is similar or the same for each one. The topics covered thus far are numerous. They can be found on Amazon and other websites.

My wife and I have used the one on Marriage Conflict-Talking as Teammates by Steve Hoppe in our counseling at our church since one of the most common presenting issues in marriage counseling is communication.

I will use Talking as Teammates to explain the structure of the devotionals. In the case of Talking as Teammates, it is assumed that the couple each gets a copy and does the day separately, then gets together to compare notes. 

The days are arranged in categories of varying lengths. Talking as Teammates break down the categories into four. They are:

1. Marriage Conflict Starting Points

This category gets things started and covers three days.

2. Marriage Conflict Pitfalls

This category covers the next eleven days.

3. Marriage Conflict Essentials

This category covers the next fourteen days.

4. Marriage Conflict and Community

This category covers the last three days.

Each day starts with a specific Bible verse that connects with communications or conflict. For example, the verse for day one is Matthew 12:34b:

For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. (Matt.12:34b, ESV)

The book’s author then explains the significance of the verse to point to what the Bible means by the heart and to explain to a couple that their issue is more of a heart problem than a communication problem.

After the brief study, there is an application section with three categories. 

1. Reflect as a Couple
2. Reflect by Yourself
3. Act

The application section is meant to encourage change from the inside out (heart change) by putting into practice what has just been learned.

In my experience as a biblical counselor, I have found that Talking as Teammates is an excellent first step in helping a couple resolve their issues.

Without learning to communicate using Scriptural principles and commands, the couple will continue a downward spiral of anger, bitterness, and misunderstanding. Submitting their communication to the Word of God is a necessity, not an option.

I usually assign the book a few days at a time and encourage the husband to take the initiative to set up a dedicated time to talk over the conflict/communications Scriptures cited in the day’s study. Many are imperatives which means to disregard is to disobey Jesus (John 14:15).

Although I have not read all the 31-Day Devotionals, the ones I have are excellent, and Steve Hoppe’s Talking as Teammates is no exception. I highly recommend Talking as Teammates by Steve Hoppe.

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